As the festival approaches so does the most dreaded activity in my festival preparations – training. At a minimum I need to start doing some basic cardio and leg work to strengthen the muscles around my joints to protect against festival knee. About mid-week every year my joints, especially my knees start to audibly and painfully protest the hours spent standing very still, followed by short bursts of marching up stairs, followed by sitting very still for two hours followed by a quick run down stairs to a sprint on pavement to do it all again. Add in the odd night of bar crawling that could last till four am thanks to the extended drinking hours at festival bars (and thank you city of Toronto!) and by the end of the festival all I want is bedrest Misery-style just so I never have to stand again. My current level of unfitness is somewhere between your average nerd duo on Amazing Race and that kid in school who always had a note to get out of gym class. In this state I won’t make it out of the ticket pick-up line. Time to get back on the Wii so it can mock me with my decidedly rubenesque avatar.